Things you need to know before marriage

Things you need to know before marriage

There is a lot to do during singlehood, marriage is not the only thing you can look forward to achieving. Some singles suspend everything else for marriage. Don’t waste singlehood waiting for marriage, explore all the available opportunities because once the period slips away it cannot be recovered.

This period is essentially the learning phase of life. A single person has quite a number of things to learn before the arrival of the next phase. Not learning some of these lessons does not mean they are doomed for eternal singlehood, it only increases the chances of unhappiness and divorce after marriage. As earlier noted, a well-prepared person performs better than an average smart person. Therefore the single stage is basically a period where devotion should be given to learning.

You should therefore learn:

  1. Your purpose: A person’s purpose is the reason why a person exists or why s/he was created. That purpose should be a cause you are willing to live and die for. It is your God-given assignment. To discover your purpose ask critical questions like:
  • Why was I created or why am I here?
  • Why have I been preserved?
  • What interests me?
  • What is my passion?
  • What gets me angry enough to take action?
  • What can I do forever for the love of it?

Discovering purpose is essential because it saves people from aimlessly wandering through life. It increases focus on a single goal and this increases the chances of achievement of goals.

2. How to earn: There is no age limit to learning. No matter how old you are, learn a trade/skill, perfect your skills, know the secret of your trade, be productive. If this aspect of life has not been perfected then you are frankly unprepared for marriage. Marriage is expensive, there is no romance without finance. You need money to fund the anticipated fun with your partner. Anyone dating a penniless, jobless, skill-less, visionless person with zero potential to earn is courting trouble.

3. Responsibility: Ensure responsibility is extensively practiced before your decision to marry. Be responsible for little chores around the house that you can be held responsible and accountable for if left undone.

4. Learn about the opposite sex: There are traits that are peculiar to each sex. Avail yourself with fundamental information and facts that will regulate your expectation to more realistic dreams. There is a need to state that any information gathered at this stage should still be subjected to reality test when your partner eventually emerges. Give room for your partner’s peculiarity and uniqueness. This information are only general guides and usually come in handy.

5. Know yourself: Some people require other people’s approval to define their self-worth. This is utterly inappropriate. People can give you a misleading definition based on erroneous perception. Some people run after labels of big brands, stamps of famous people or endorsement from the high and mighty to define themselves.


To get more information on how to succeed in marriage and relationship, get my book “RELATIONSHIP UNFEIGNED”. To get yours, click this link


Nike Adekunle is the president of SWiM (Sisters, Wives and Mothers} Forum. At SWiM, Nike and her team equips men, women, married and singles with all the information and strategies needed to make relationships and marriage work. In collaboration with members of SWiM, She hosts REALationship Unfeigned (an initiative that promotes healthy relationships) and Roaring Lioness (a prayer focus group). Nike is a relationship coach, marriage counselor, blogger, writer and an author. She currently has four books to her credit. To get her books, visit

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